Clones, explosions, and bombs! Oh my!
by Katydid777
Summary: Just a fun little skit with Anakin, Ahsoka, Obi-wan, Rex, Gree, and a new character: Ashlaa! It's funny at the end! Just keep reading
1. Level 14 of the lower levels hurts

**Okay, before you read this there are some things I have to tell you.**

**1. Ahsoka is crazy (you know, like nuts!)**

**2. Ashlaa is her twin sister**

**3. Chessur is their cat (like Alice in Wonderland)**

**4. I wrote this a while ago, but it is my favorite story that I made**

**5. It is written like a play (sort of)**

**Okay, now you may read it**

Anakin wakes up to the sound of war and soon realizes it's not a dream...

He goes to the bridge and they are all in a huge battle in space and explosions are going off everywhere.

Random clone: General, there is a distress signal on level 14 of the lower levels. We need to send someone down to help...

Anakin: I don't know if we...

Obi-wan:I'll go (runs out)

Anakin: Wait! Master! (groan)

They continue fighting for a few minutes.

Same random clone: Sir, they are preparing to fire!

(BOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!)

(Ship shakes)

Anakin: Fire back and give me a damage report!

Still the same random clone: Yes sir, and it directly hit...level...14...of the lower levels...

Anakin: WHAT?! WAS OBI-WAN DOWN THERE?

STILL THE SAME RANDOM CLONE!: (terrified) Ummm...yes...sir?...

Anakin: Ahsoka Take the con! (runs out)

Ahsoka: WAIT! MASTER! ARE YOU SURE THAT'S THE WISEST...(groan)

Anakin flies through the halls down to level 14 of the lower levels

Anakin: MASTER! MASTER!

(weak groan from somewhere)

Anakin removes random fallen objects to reveal Obi-wan's pale and bloody face

Anakin: (relieved to find him but scared to lose him) Master...

Obi-wan: (groan)

Anakin: Just hang on there. (sends a distress signal)

*On the bridge*

That same random clone...: Commander! We are receiving a distress signal on level 14 of the lower levels...again...

Ahsoka: Well now what do we do?...(groan) Random you have the con! (exits with Ahslaa, Rex, and Gree)

They continue down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down...to level 13...

Ahsoka: the elevator won't work and the stairs are blocked...that's great...come on...

(they run on)

(come to a split)

Ahsoka: Which way is it?

(Silence) Rex shrugs

Ahsoka: Rex and Gree, you go left. Me and Ashlaa will go right.

(They split up)

Rex: Where are we going?

Gree (little to happily): No idea!

Rex (soliloquey): This is what I'm stuck with every day...

(Explosion, Rex stumbles a little, but Gree doesn't)

Gree: Are you drunk?

Rex: No, are you?

Gree: No

Rex: Are you sure?

Gree: Y~ic

*THE SISTERS*

Ahsoka: So, what do we do when we're done?

Ahslaa: I'm going to play with Chessur, then take a peaceful catnap.

Ahsoka: But I thought it was grooming day...

Ashlaa: Is not! That was yesterday!

Ahsoka: Well it's my turn to play with Chessur today!

Ashlaa: No it's not!

Ahsoka: Yes it is!

(Ashlaa pushes Ahsoka and Ahsoka falls through the floor right next to Anakin)

Ahsoka: (wingapo wave) Heeeeeyyyy...(excited) Now I'm on level 14 of the lower level with you!

Anakin: That's nice Snips

(Obi-wan coughs up blood)

Anakin: Master?

Obi-wan: (weakly and faintly) yes? (Almost passes out)

Anakin:Master, stay awake!

Obi-wan: (annoyed) I am awake!

Anakin: Well, then...stay alive.

Obi-wan: Stop being so bossy...

Anakin: Well I'm a little stressed out right now!

Obi-wan: (weakly and faintly) Oh, _you _are stressed out?

Anakin: Shh! You need to be quiet, master!

Obi-wan:That...brings...back...memories...(long exhale)

(Complete silence)

Anakin:Obi-wan? OBI-WAN!

Obi-wan: (whispers) what? You told me...to be...quiet...

Anakin: I'm sorry, I just didn't know if you were still alive...

...(more complete silence)

Anakin: Master?

Obi-wan (annoyed but weak): WHAT?!

Anakin: Stop scaring me!

Obi-wan: sorry...(cough,cough)(more blood)

Anakin: All right, last time, stay awake, and be quiet.

Silence (except for Obi-wan's wheezing)

Ahsoka: (completely unconcerned) Master? What's your favorite letter?

Anakin: What?

Ahsoka: Mine's the squiggly! ~

Anakin: Shut up Snips...

Obi-wan (barely whispering) Anakin...(small wheeze)

Anakin: Obi-wan, I told you to be quiet! Will you please just listen to me?!

Obi-wan (a little louder): Anakin!...(softer) If I die...I want yo uto know something...

Anakin: Obi-wan, don't say things like that! You're going to be okay! Everything will be alright!

Obi-wan: No, Anakin...I...

Anakin: Stop talking okay? You're going to be alright! Trust me!

Obi-wan (louder but almost dying because he uses all the strength he has left) ANAKIN!...(gasp in pain)

Anakin: Master?!

Obi-wan: Anakin, you have made...me proud...my son...(last exhale)(he dies)

Anakin: Master!? MASTER!?

(Anakin starts to sob)

Ahsoka: Well that was dramatic...Oh hey, I remember something! Master!

Anakin: Not now, Ahsoka...(sniffle)

Ahsoka: But it's important...It's about Obi-wan!...

Anakin: (sniffle) What is it, Snips?

Ahsoka: He told me to give you a message if he died..(thinking, then getting confused)...today, actually...

Anakin: How can that be?

Ahsoka: I don't know. Maybe hea dreamed about his death. You know, like a vision...

Anakin: What's the message?(sniffle)

Ahsoka: I don't understand it...(goes into deep thought)...(Silence)...

Anakin: Well?

Ahsoka: Oh! Well, um, let's see...oh yeah! He told me to tell you: Computer end program!

(The scene of war and chaos is revealed to reveal the holo deck)

Obi-wan starts laughing

Obi-wan: Got you! (laughter)

Anakin: Huh? What? (realizing what just happened) Obi-wan! That's not funny! I thought you really died!

Obi-wan: I am glad you care about me, Anakin, but I just could not resist!

Anakin: That's it! If the fake explosions didn't kill you, then I will!

They tackle and get into a huge fight on level 14 of the lower levels, which Ahsoka has to break apart by the way...

THE END!

That same random clone again!: Hey! My name is Random, and though I might not get much credit for being in this short story, I should tell you that it was fun to make and the author would really appreciate it if you would review and tell her what you think! She would also like to know your favorit. part of this story! Oh! And if you have any ideas for other short stories to go ahead and share those too! Thank you for reading!


	2. Battle Banter

**This story is...you guessed it, banter on the battlefield! Thank you all for reading!**

**Battlefield Banter**

Obi-wan: Blast! We can not get through that shield! Ahsoka! Ahslaa! Take it down!

The Tanos: Will do! Got it!

Anakin: Why are you ordering my padawan around?

Obi-wan: Because you are not...

Anakin: But she's MY padawan!

Obi-wan: Only you can have a pointless argument in the middle of a big battle that can turn the tide of the clone wars...

Anakin: And only you can make a very long sentence describing me having a pointless argument while you are in the middle of a big battle that can turn the tide of the clone wars.

Obi-wan:(famous Obi-wan glare)

Anakin: (smiling) What?

Obi-wan: Nothing. Just that pointless argument is still going on...

Anakin: I'm just waiting for the shield to drop...

Obi-wan: It did.

Anakin: When?

Obi-wan: When you were having the pointless argument.

Ahsoka: MASTER! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!

Anakin: why didn't you tell hER to take over and destroy it?

Obi-wan: I'm not supposed to order her around remember?

Anakin: Very funny...

Ahsoka: I'm waiting!...

Obi-wan: Take command of the troops and destroy it.

Anakin: There you go ordering her around again. I told you not to do that.

Obi-wan: But...I...uh...oh, nevermind

They win

The End!

**I hope you liked it! If you have a suggestion for another, please let me know!**


	3. Fun on the Battlefield

**Thank you to all who are reading this! I have another fun space battle after this too!**

_**Fun on the Battlefield (for Anakin anyway)**_

Obi-wan: ANAKIN! I Told You To Go To The OTHER SIDE Of The Fort! What Are You Doing OVER HERE!?

Anakin: Sorry Master, but I thought I should be over here because the fighting is, well, over here!

Obi-wan: Anakin! Will you ever listen to an order I give you?!

Anakin: Where's thefun in doing everything you're told to do?

Obi-wan: Anakin, this is not a laughing matter! It is going to get you killed someday!

Anakin: (whining/groaning) Master, you know I only disobey orders if it's absolutely necessary...

Obi-wan: And when, might I ask, is it absoluteLy necessary to disobey my orders?

Anakin: When they're wrong.

Obi-wan: WRONG?! Are you saying all of my orders are wrong!?

Anakin: Not all of them...

Obi-wan: (groans) Fine. I will follow the orders I gave you, and you stay here and fight. (starts to leave)

Anakin: THOSE orders are right!

Obi-wan: (groan) Anakin...just...stop it! Okay?

Obi-wan leaves and after a few minutes of fighting...

Anakin: (through comlink) Master! How are things going over there?

Obi-wan: Oh! Just wonderful Anakin! They are attacking from this side too!

Anakin: See Master! YOU'RE needed over there!

Obi-wan: Very funny, Anakin. I need to go. (grunt) There are commando droids over (grunt) here!

Anakin: (smiling) Don't let them give you any trouble...

(silence because Obi-wan is glaring at him through the comlink, and Anakin can tell)

Obi-wan:... ... ...So, what is going on over there?

Anakin: Oh! Not much!

Obi-wan: Anakin! What did you do?!

Anakin: NOTHING!

Obi-wan: Anakin,...what...did...you...do?

Anakin: I set some explosives in the separatist facility and blew it up...

Obi-wan: What?! How in the galaxy did you get in, and how did I not hear or see it explode?

Anakin: Commander Gree has this new silent bomb! It's pretty cool! As for not seeing it, maybe you just weren't looking?

Obi-wan: (sighs) You win today Anakin, but one day you will regret you ev disobeyed my orders!

Anakin: Thanks for the warning Obi-wan, but since I survived your training and insults, I think I'll be fine.

Obi-wan: But Anakin!-

Anakin: Anakin out!

THE END!

**Thanks for reading! The next chapter will be the space battle, but if you have any suggestions, please share! I need ideas if I am to keep writing! Thanks again!**


	4. The Prankster!

**Hi! Sorry I took so long! I know I was supposed to put a space battle in this chapter, but I got an awesome idea from a reviewer. Thank you, Jedi Katie-Kenobi for sending the idea! I hope you like it! If you have more ideas, please send them in! Have fun!**

**The Prankster!**

Ahsoka: (tired) Master? What are you doing? (yawn) It's midnight!

Anakin: (holding a bucket of water and whispering) Shh! Be quiet Snips! You'll wake him!

Ahsoka: Who? Obi-wan? (realizing what he's doing) Why are you putting a bucket of water over his door?

Anakin: (whispering) I'm getting payback for the prank on the holo deck! Don't tell him!

Ahsoka: Pranks? I love pranks! Can I help?

Anakin: (still whispering) Only if you are quiet!

They continue to place pranks until two in the morning, then they leave. At six a.m. Obi-wan wakes up. He puts on his tunic over his airtight suit. He starts to comb his hair, but realizes it smells like maple syrup.

Obi-wan: (thinking) This must be Anakin's payback...I should have known he would try to get revenge.

He combed his hair with his fingers, and turned to his bedside table to get his lightsaber. Only...it wasn't there.

Obi-wan: (sigh) Anakin...you will regret this day!

He opened the door and a bucket of water fell on him soaking him completely.

Obi-wan: (thinking) I shouldn't have gotten angry...it made me forget to watch out for pranks...I'll find another way to teach him to respect his Master...(sigh)...after I get changed...

He goes back into his room and removes his wet tunic. The airtight suit was also waterproof, so it remained dry. He went through his other tunics (which were all the same) and picked one. He tried it on, but...it was too small! He looked through all the rest and they were all too small!

Obi-wan: Anakin! This is too far! That is it! Revenge is coming!

As he hung his tunic up to dry, he plotted his revenge. Afterward, he started working in his quarters. He typed a few mission reports, and answered some formal letters (including some from a certain Duchess of Mandalore *wink*). He saw that Senator Amidala wanted to have lunch together to catch up on things. He responded asking her to join him in his quarters at the temple. When his tunic was dry, he put it on and waited for the Senator. She soon arrived and they had a wonderful lunch. When it was time for her to leave, he gently led her to the door and said goodbye. When they opened the door, gallons of water fell on them.

Padmé: Obi-wan! How could you!? You know I have a meeting this afternoon!

Obi-wan: (trying to dry himself) It was not me!

Padmé: Then who was it?!

They both looked up. Anakin was standing over them holding an empty bucket with Ahsoka standing next to him with another empty bucket. Anakin looked at sopping, wet Padmé with a horrified expression.

Padmé: (shouting angrily) Anakin! Get down here now! I have something to say to you!

He took off running and Padmé followed.

Padmé: (fading) Anakin! Get back here! How dare you, Ani! I'm going to get you for this!

Ahsoka retreated to her quarters mumbling something like: "It was his idea!" Obi-wan looked at the floor in the hallway that they had taken off in, and he saw his lightsaber. Anakin had dropped it while fleeing from his angry wife. He picked it up and confirmed it was his. He could still hear Padmé screaming at Anakin.

Obi-wan: My work here is done...it was nice knowing you Anakin...

**The end!**

**I hope you like it! Please review! Send suggestions for more short stories! Thanks for reading!**


	5. Space Battle (More fun for Anakin)

**Space Battle**

**Here is the promised space battle. Even though it's short I hope you like it!**

Anakin and Obi-wan are helping Jedi Master Luminara Unduli defeat the Separatists in a space battle.

Obi-wan: All units deploy! Take out those fighters! Anakin, get to the bridge now!

Anakin: Master, I can be of more use on Master Luminara's ship!

Obi-wan: No Anakin, we need you on the bridge...I need you on the bridge!

Anakin: Okay... A few minutes later...

Obi-wan: Master Luminara, what is the damage?

Luminara: My shields are down to 26%, and if we are hit 5 more times the shields will be gone. (Beow-boom) Make that four...

Obi-wan: Copy that! Anakin, Where Are You!

Anakin: I'm sorry master, I cant come to the bridge...

Obi-wan: WHAT?! WHY NOT?!

Anakin: Because I'm kinda on Luminara's ship...

Obi-wan: What?! How Did You Get Over There?!

Anakin: I uh... beamed over here?...

Obi-wan: Anakin! That is Star TREK! How did you get over there?!

Anakin: I uh...I jettisoned into space and climbed aboard!

Obi-wan: ANAKIN!

Anakin: Alright, alright! When you sent out the pilots to take care of the fighters, I snuck onboard a ship and flew to Luminara's ship...

Obi-wan: ANA...UH... BUT...(deep breath) Alright...(another deep breath) Why are you over there?

Anakin: I told you. I would be more useful over here...

Obi-wan: Anakin!

Luminara: Master Kenobi! My shields have been recharged to 100%. Please thank Anakin for me!

Obi-wan: (gritted teeth) Of course Luminara.

Anakin: See master?

Obi-wan: You impertinent nerf-herder!

Anakin: (smile)

THE END!

**Please review for more stories! Up next, our gang goes to McDonalds! Thanks for reading!**


	6. Bada-ba-ba-ba! Are they lovin' it?

**Okay! Here's the next chapter! Sorry for the wait...Thanks go to Captainrexbest35 for the idea! Enjoy!**

**Bada-ba-ba-ba, Are they lovin' it?**

Ahsoka: Master? Where are we going to eat?

Anakin: Hmm...how about McDonalds?

Obi-wan: Anakin! That is the worst choice I have ever heard of. It has got to be the most unhealthy and disgusting food in the galaxy! We have government rations for a reason!

Anakin: Come on! Just once! I want to try a hamburger! I've never had one before!

Obi-wan: Disgusting American invention...

Anakin: (puppy eyes) Please?

Obi-wan: That does not work on me.

Ahsoka joins in with puppy eyes.

Obi-wan: Nope! Still does not work...oh all right! We can go...

They go to McDonalds and search the menu.

Ahsoka: I think I want the chicken nugge- hey! Why is everyone staring at me?

Obi-wan: Everyone here on earth is human. They have probably never seen a Togruta before.

Anakin: Or maybe she's just ugly...

Ahsoka: Master! (whimper) That hurt!

Anakin: I was just kidding. (looks at Obi-wan and laughs) Lighten up Obi-wan, you look like a statue!

Obi-wan: You know how I said that there was never a greater hive of scum and villainy than Mos Eisley?

Anakin: Yeah...why?

Obi-wan: I stand corrected. This place is much worse.

Anakin: Oh Master! This place's food is probably much better than our rations! Look at all the people who eat here willingly!

Obi-wan: Are you sure it is their own will? They have probably done some strange sorcery over the food to make it delicious, and keep people coming back...or this could be the "best food" this miserable planet has and they eat this so they do not have to eat anywhere else...

Anakin: Or maybe it's just delicious!

Obi-wan: I do not care, Anakin. I am still not buying anything.

Anakin: Suit yourself. I think I want the Big Mac.

They order and go to a table. Ahsoka got the drinks. When she headed to the table, she gave a short scream and ran to Anakin.

Anakin: What is it Snips? What's wrong?

Ahsoka: Master! Save them!

Anakin: Save who?

Ahsoka: The poor children! There is some scary species abducting children over there! (she points)

Anakin and Obi-wan look in the direction she is pointingand see a clown hugging and taking pictures with children.

Anakin: What...in the galaxy...is that?

Obi-wan: The scariest thing I have ever seen...Hurry up and eat so we can leave this wretched place.

Ahsoka: Master, it's scaring me! Can we go? Please?!

Anakin: Eat your nuggets first.

Ahsoka scarfed them down, while keeping her eyes on the clown. He noticed she was looking at him, and decided that she wanted to meet him. He headed over to their table. Ahsoka ran out the door screaming, and headed toward the ship.

Obi-wan: I will go check on her... (quickly walks out)

Anakin: Uh-huh...sure.

The clown had gone back to the group of children. Anakin was a little creeped out by the strange creature, but he had seen worse on Tatooine. He took his first bite out of his hamburger and instantly fell in love.

Anakin: Sorry Padmé, but I love another. (bite) Mmmmmmmm...Bada ba ba ba...I AM lovin' it!

**The End!**

**(Did you notice that Obi-wan does not use contractions?)**

**Thank you for reading! Hope it was funny! Please review whether it's your favorite part/story, or another idea! If you send an idea, I WILL make a story! Thanks again!**


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